Soothing Repetition, Old Friends in Books, Comfort Foods
Soothing Repetition, Old Friends in Books, Comfort Foods
If you re-read books do you also usually order the same thing off of a menu?
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This was one of my very early posts here on Substack and it’s a topic that continues to interest and intrigue me so I wanted to republish it here.
I am really enjoying a conversation over in Substack Notes about whether or not each person is a re-reader of books. In fact, I’m enjoying it so much that I started to post a new comment only to realize that with as much as I’m writing, it makes a lot more sense to do a new letter here instead. So, that’s what this is … a letter exploring why some of us re-read books and some of us don’t and wondering aloud if this correlates to other things in our lives.
First a shoutout to
whose mention of re-reading in her great interview of novelist Rene Denfeld is what sparked this conversation. Jane asked what Rene’s favorite re-reads are and if they had helped her through dark times and as someone who almost never re-reads I was so intrigued by the question. (And thanks to Jane for also continuing this conversation with me in Notes too.)Do Re-Readers Also Order The Same Thing Off All Menus?
This is the question that I’m randomly now super curious about.
In response to my post,
said, “I consider old favorites my literary comfort food.” Literary comfort food is such a terrific phrase. And then added “If you eat a good meal, chances are you will order again. You know what’s coming, but will still enjoy it.”So true! And also I noted that I often order a new thing off of a menu instead of an old favorite. Although thinking more about it, that varies a lot for me. I do have a lot of favorite menu items. Nevertheless, I tend not to re-read a whole lot and I often order a new thing from a menu, and I wondered if there was any correlation.
Posing that question re-reader Michele answered, “I order new food, too, but then I envy people eating their favorites.” :-p
Which is just so interesting right?
So I ask you: do you re-read and do you order new things off a menu? Do these things correlate?
A Few Other Metaphors and Descriptions
Other than literary comfort food, some of the most brilliant descriptions about re-reading included:
said, “Books on a shelf represent places I’ve visited and enjoyed, and plan to visit again.” (To which I noted that although I don’t do this with books, I definitely do it with TV, where I have “friends” I go to visit again and again.)Similarly,
said, “when I find a book I love I book a return ticket at least once a year.” (I love the two uses of the word book in this response.) And added that there’s one they read every spring, saying something else I love: “its’ my favorite ‘leaving winter behind’ read.” I love the ritual of that! is a frequent re-reader who has “been through Irvine Welsh’s entire back catalogue many, many times and usually pick up a nugget or morsel I missed the first dozen times.” Now that I think of it, that could also be a food reference!
To Re-Read or Not To Re-Read …
In learning from the people here who do and don’t re-read, what I think I’m learning is that there may be many reasons for either choice but the two core reasons are:
People who do re-read are looking for that literary comfort and familiarity.
Jane said she chooses one of her re-reads “because I find such comfort in it especially during these weirdly hard times we’re in.”
says, “Living inside a familiar story with a familiar set of characters is a huge self-soothe for my anxious soul.” said, “I have about a half dozen books I reread every few years. There are just times when I would rather read something I know is great rather than risk my time on an unknown entity.”People who do not re-read much don’t want to miss out on reading all of the new things that are on their for later shelves.
said, “I typically don’t reread books cause there are so many new books I want to read.” She is reading Gone Girl (here’s her article on that) and was surprised when someone said that’s a re-read for them: “it would never occur to me to reread a thriller - you already know the end.” But then for some people there’s comfort in that right? says, “I get worried about all the great books in the world I’ve not yet read and whether I’ll have time to read them.”Hannah from
said “I often have the intention to re-read certain books - but there are just so many new ones that entice me instead.” She mentioned that there’s one book that she does re-read and I asked why and part of her response that stood out to me was, “I guess the book has almost become a friend that I can consult.”And both things, re-reading or not, it seems to me, relate to mental health symptoms. (I believe that we are all on a mental health spectrum, diagnosis or not.)
D.W. of One Could Arguewrote something in Managerial Impotence
that adds to the ongoing Substack conversation I’ve been having about whether or not people re-read books:
“When I’m stressed or inspired or exhausted or lonely or optimistic, all of which I have been in combination for weeks now, I must flee to cherished passages from favored books. Even if I’m not going to read or re-read the whole book I often like to simply touch them, peruse them and/or just have ‘em around like intellectual stuffed animals.”
Re-Reading and Mental Health Symptoms
Although I’m not a huge re-reader myself, I do relate to the feeling of wanting that comfort and familiarity when you sit down with various mediums. I am someone who watches the same types of tv shows (formulaic, think Law and Order) and the same episodes again and again. I read somewhere, and it resonated, that this is common among people with anxiety because knowing what’s going to happen is soothing in comparison to the suspense of a new show.
In thinking about it, even though I don’t re-read books often, I almost always read in the same limited genres. Women writing memoirs about their internal and external worlds is my favorite genre and there’s definitely a comforting formula there even among books that are very original. So maybe in that sense I re-read. It soothes any anxiety.
And I think this isn’t just about anxiety. I have chronic recurrent depression and as I explained in depth in my letter about Why I Might Not Read Your Writing, this causes problems with reading at times. Fatigue, inability to focus, reduced ability to process information, memory challenges … all of these make reading hard in a way. I actually turn to reading a lot for distraction when in depression (it feels productive, and as much as I hate productivity culture sometimes that still matters to me.) The formulaic writing I’m familiar with is easier so I can see how re-reads would potentially make sense as well. A drawback of reading in depression is that I rarely remember what I have read even when I know I loved the book.
And yet, I don’t usually re-read. And for me that has a lot to do with the fact that there will never be enough days in a lifetime to read all of the books that I already know I want to read, let alone all that I might come across in the future. I literally have over ten thousand books on my “for later” virtual library shelf, and I keep adding to them. I enjoy the ritual of looking through the new titles available each week and adding them to the list. And I think this has to do with hope for the future, which also relates to my mental health.
In depression, I stop enjoying what I know I love to do. And at times my depression has been so dark that I did not want to continue living. The long list of books that I want to read represents, I think, the part of me that knows that I do want to keep living and that I will keep finding joy again and reading is a huge joy for me. Stacks of books intended to read feel hopeful to me even in the darkest of times. They are something to live for.
So, I can see symptoms of anxiety and depression that inspiring re-reading as well as choosing not to re-read. And I can imagine how symptoms of OCD, mania, and other conditions would also impact this choice.
So I ask you: do you see any correlation between mental health symptoms (including garden variety stress, grief, etc.) and your decision to re-read or not?
A Later Conversation
This topic has come up several times in the ten months since I originally wrote about it, both in my own writing and among others. Here are some of those references:
Kate Jones of
shared Do You Re-Read? Her post was inspired by a post called Going Back to the Well byElizabeth Marro of . And I wrote about that in a digest:Elizabeth said:
“I return to books I’ve already read for any of the following reasons, sometimes all at once:
I’m yearning for a familiar world and a familiar voice
I have the feeling I missed something the first time around
I am looking for inspiration or examples of how to make a book work - structure, characters, beginnings, endings, language. Right now, my writing desk is surrounded by stacks of books I pick up and put down when I need to see, yet again, how a writer did something I am trying to do.
Research or to refresh my memory in order to write about the book
Something I can’t identify - my internal “book compass” – steers me back to a book because I need it.”
For Kate:
“In the winter and especially around the busyness of the winter holidays, I like to curl up with a familiar read; something I know that will hit the right spot. This is the time you will find me tucking into a favourite short story collection or a short, feel-good novel.”
Whereas in the summer, she’s more likely to read new things. Referencing my post, I said:
“I loved the idea of literary comfort food and was so intrigued by the question of whether re-readers also order the same thing from menus. It’s been such an interesting thing to explore. As a general rule I am not a re-reader and I try to order new things off of menus but there seems to be a correlation to the exceptions to that for me.”
Kate said that she would be someone who orders the same thing off of menus. It is a topic that continues to interest me!
With this conversation,
mentioned said:“Oh I love a good re-read!! It’s nice to return to something you know will be good, and you can enjoy it and pick up on new things you missed the first time around.”
I asked about favorites and the answer was:
“I’ve re-read LOTR 5 times, and another favourite of mine Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell about the same amount of times. Planning to re-read The Three Body Problem soon too. What about you?”
I noted:
Lord of the Rings is a really popular re-read among the people I asked.
I don’t re-read a lot. Interestingly, most of my re-reads are ones that I read really quick the first time and love and then savor again a second time within a month or two of the first reading. Glennon Doyle’s Untamed. Lisa Carver’s Reconsidering Yoko Ono. I knew when I read them the first time through that I wasn’t absorbing as much as I wanted.
I have recently started re-reading some of Milan Kundera who I read about twenty years ago. There are just so many books I haven’t read yet that I want to read!!!!
Fun Stuff: What Do People Re-Read?
In case you’re curious, I’ve rounded up what people have told me they are re-readers of. In no particular order:
Anne Lamott, especially “Bird by Bird”
Tara French’s Dublin Murder Squad
“The How” by
Eve Babitz
Joan Didion
Mary Oliver
Jonathan Coe’s “The House of Sleep”
John Steinbeck
Rene Denfeld
Stella Gibbons’ “Cold Comfort Farm”
David Sedaris
Nora Ephron
“Lord of the Rings”
F. Scott Fitzgerlad
Sandra Tsing Loh’s “Depth Takes a Holiday”
Also popular for re-reads are books from childhood and early adulthood. I recently shared about re-reading The Bell Jar. Reem from
is “revisting all the books that made ann impact on me in my 20’s.” Other childhood books mentioned included “Little Women” and “Charlotte’s Web.”Let’s discuss …
Is there any correlation for you between re-reading and whether or not you order familiar things on a menu?
Do you re-watch tv shows and movies and is this the same as your decision to re-read or not?
Do you see any correlation between mental health symptoms (including garden variety stress, grief, etc.) and your decision to re-read or not?
What’s the number one reason that you would re-read a book?
What are your favorite books to re-read?
Definitely a re-reader of Steinbeck and Fitzgerald but not as comfort food.
I re-read them and others because they are extraordinary writers and great storytellers. The magic of books is that I am the filter they pass through and because I change and the world changes, so do my thoughts on what I am reading.
Perhaps a book I read years ago may seem prescient now. Perhaps I am shocked at how racist the language is. Maybe I read books when I was too young to pick up on certain things. I generally know far more about the writer than I did the first few times and that can be a real eye-opener.
This is kind of funny but most of the books I still re-read and enjoy are ones that I found when I was just a kid. I had no idea these dusty old books on the shelves of my grandparents, friends of my parents, left by someone else at the beach or the laundromat were classics or famous. I was just bored and loved to read. But I have never re-read Scruples or Sybil, both of which I read in 4th grade. Silent Spring I read again recently and remembered what a depressing and lonely place 7th grade was...I remembered hiding it, making it look like I was looking at my textbook. Many many books read this way I still re-visit and value our time together. Vonnegut, Cheever, Hesse, Hemingway...but no, they are not comfort food. Most of them found me a long time ago and they continue to expand my thinking and it seems like I havev never read the same book twice, not even on our sixth or seventh meeting.
What fun to continue this conversation, Kathryn - thank you!
I absolutely DO order the same thing off the menu (or at least from a short list of my best familiar things); I also prepare my own meals from a short list of familiar menus, re-watch TV series until I can repeat the dialogue along with the characters, and dress myself from a frankly monotonous wardrobe. And it absolutely correlates to mental health; it's just recently become clear to me that all of this same-same in my life is a way to redirect energy by lowering anxiety. What pulls energy is starting new things - a new piece of writing, a new conversation, a new recipe, a book I've never read. All those "starts" can lead to wonderful, energizing things ... but the starts themselves are a challenge, and I end up cushioning them with lots of restful, unchallenging sameness.
Also, and not for nothing: the same extravagant imagination that feeds my poetry also makes me a world-class talent at catastrophic thinking ... and catastrophic thinking is exhausting. And frightening, to boot. Same/familiar stories, etc., give me a place to rest from both real and imagined catastrophes.