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Jun 1, 2023Liked by Kathryn Vercillo

Definitely a re-reader of Steinbeck and Fitzgerald but not as comfort food.

I re-read them and others because they are extraordinary writers and great storytellers. The magic of books is that I am the filter they pass through and because I change and the world changes, so do my thoughts on what I am reading.

Perhaps a book I read years ago may seem prescient now. Perhaps I am shocked at how racist the language is. Maybe I read books when I was too young to pick up on certain things. I generally know far more about the writer than I did the first few times and that can be a real eye-opener.

This is kind of funny but most of the books I still re-read and enjoy are ones that I found when I was just a kid. I had no idea these dusty old books on the shelves of my grandparents, friends of my parents, left by someone else at the beach or the laundromat were classics or famous. I was just bored and loved to read. But I have never re-read Scruples or Sybil, both of which I read in 4th grade. Silent Spring I read again recently and remembered what a depressing and lonely place 7th grade was...I remembered hiding it, making it look like I was looking at my textbook. Many many books read this way I still re-visit and value our time together. Vonnegut, Cheever, Hesse, Hemingway...but no, they are not comfort food. Most of them found me a long time ago and they continue to expand my thinking and it seems like I havev never read the same book twice, not even on our sixth or seventh meeting.

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Oh this is an interesting take! Re-reading regularly for growth rather than comfort. I can see that. I have definitely seen some new things in old books and your sentence about being the filter captures that perfectly. For as much as I see myself as someone who doesn’t re-read a lot, I did also just start re-reading Kundera who I read in my twenties.

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What fun to continue this conversation, Kathryn - thank you!

I absolutely DO order the same thing off the menu (or at least from a short list of my best familiar things); I also prepare my own meals from a short list of familiar menus, re-watch TV series until I can repeat the dialogue along with the characters, and dress myself from a frankly monotonous wardrobe. And it absolutely correlates to mental health; it's just recently become clear to me that all of this same-same in my life is a way to redirect energy by lowering anxiety. What pulls energy is starting new things - a new piece of writing, a new conversation, a new recipe, a book I've never read. All those "starts" can lead to wonderful, energizing things ... but the starts themselves are a challenge, and I end up cushioning them with lots of restful, unchallenging sameness.

Also, and not for nothing: the same extravagant imagination that feeds my poetry also makes me a world-class talent at catastrophic thinking ... and catastrophic thinking is exhausting. And frightening, to boot. Same/familiar stories, etc., give me a place to rest from both real and imagined catastrophes.

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Thank you so much for elaborating on this because a lot of it resonates even though some is different for me. I have an extensive wardrobe and I rarely re-read but as I mentioned I am a tv re-watcher and even though I order new off the menu I do often make the same things at home.

I think part of what you’ve hit on here is also related to decision fatigue. If we spend all our energy deciding what to wear and eat and read and watch then we are depleted and it’s harder to think clearly or make other decisions.

As someone whose early adult work in therapy was mostly “don’t catastrophize, don’t future trip” that part resonates as well and I want to mull this a bit more as it relates to the flip side of creativity.

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Jun 1, 2023Liked by Kathryn Vercillo

I looked up kundera and now I want to read Unbearable Lightness. I’m glad you understood what I was saying. Also that although I am very random in my reading, books tend to find me. There is a magical or spiritual quality…even in the re-reading this tends to happen, I come across a book I read before; it is very rare that I had planned to re-read it and yet it seems to be helpful or meaningful to me, even timely, each time. I could write a book about that, no kidding!

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Oh I absolutely have had books find me! Unbearable Lightness is good. So is Identity.

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Jun 1, 2023·edited Jun 1, 2023Liked by Kathryn Vercillo

Kathryn, I can't thank you enough for mentioning me. I have a vast library. What am I thinking rereading favorites? Your newsletter made me ask myself this. I think I know. In 2020, my husband nearly died from a stroke. It's been the most difficult and traumatic time. I couldn't read. I was numb or too occupied with chaos.

Now that we are able to feel gratitude and peace, with the trauma fading, I've returned to reading. Many have been new books dealing with health, life appreciation, reexamining life purpose, etc.

Years ago, I bought Joan Didion's "The Year of Magical Thinking," about her own family medical traumas and how she handled them. I stopped halfway through. Morbid. Depressing. What a downer, I thought, as I put it back on my shelf, next to my other Didion books. Well, after my husband's medical trauma, I decided to reread "The Year of Magical Thinking." This time? I wanted to hug her and thank her for sharing her life experiences of those times. She helped me feel less alone. I'm not crazy for the way I'm thinking and behaving. That book truly helped me see how life perspective (our experiences and understandings) are the filter and lens to how we perceive information. Until I had my own experience, I thought she'd lost her magic. I just didn't want to feel what she'd lived through. I feel shallow for once feeling that way. But it's true.

For light reading, I knew the books I already read once gave me laughs, joy, and a place to get lost. But I do need to grab some new books.

Thanks for the inspiration and acknowledgment.

P.S. The reason I've reread Anne Lamott's "Bird by Bird" so many times is for how it inspires me.

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That all makes a lot of sense. And I appreciate the further thoughts on it. Trauma definitely impacts how and what and if I read. I love that book of Didion’s probably also because I found it at the time I needed it. And I don’t think it’s shallow to have not “gotten it” before ... you get it when you get it. Mine like that is Pema Chodron. ❤️

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Jun 2, 2023Liked by Kathryn Vercillo

Thanks I will read Identity

Unbearable has a wait list

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Jun 4, 2023Liked by Kathryn Vercillo

I rarely reread a book. I have a hard time keeping up with all the reading I want to do. I will knit or crochet the same pattern again, but I’ll change it a little. Often it’s just a change of color, but I also enjoy making small changes to see if they “improve” my results.

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Oh yes I hadn’t even thought about craft patterns and if people re-use them!!! More for me to think about!

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Jun 5, 2023Liked by Kathryn Vercillo

I had to ask the better half, because he loves to watch reruns of old TV shows, the ones in black and white that were reruns when we were kids, where he knows the story. He says when he travels for work he prefers to go back to the same restaurants and order the same meals, because he know it will be good. So comfort food, comfort TV for him. I think there’s so many unpredictable factors in his work travel that at least the meals can be familiar.

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Jun 27, 2023Liked by Kathryn Vercillo

I read a lot. I reread some of them as comfort books. Or, I’ll later listen to an audiobook of something I’ve already read as a book (I recently finished an audiobook read of all of J.D. Robb’s In Death series, which I’ve read as each book has come out, over 50 of them. ) Ipick up different things in audioreads than in bookreads.

My TBR shelves are huge, physically and kindle. The last few years I’ve not been able to read as much as usual because I was flat out exhausted when I got home from work (I didn’t stop working during NY’s pandemic shutdown, we still had to go to the office as we were Essential, and swamped with work. I have a several chronic illnesses that are stress exacerbated. I didn’t have the energy to do much more than “be” after work.) But I’ve also been dnf’ing more books recently than ever before. Unless it’s well-written, I’ve issues with really young protagonists anymore, and there are so many books out there that I want to read. I’ve a formula I’ve used since my thirties to not get stuck in a book that isn’t for me right now, 😁, 100-(my current age)= number of pages I’ll give it to get good. So maybe it’s more because I’m 63, and so I’m only giving 37 pages for the story to get good.

As for food, yes and no. I like to try new things as I can but, on the digestive end of things, I’ve got Celiac, IBS, Diabetes, & GERD (& surgical-goof caused gastroparesis in remission) on the digestive end of things and it’s not that easy to find restaurants that offer more than a couple meals I can safely eat, so in those places I stick with what I know is safe. But there’s a new mini-chain in New England and NY, and a few chef-owned restaurants elsewhere that offer many options and it’s so fun to try new things! [However, the main non-digestive thing I’ve got is Ankylosing Spondylitis which is treated mainly with immune-suppressants so I don’t get out to restaurants a lot lately unless it’s lunch -- not so crowded-- or outside.]

I don’t really rewatch TV shows as I don’t watch much TV unless it’s with someone else. BUT, on my own I mainly watch HGTV, and Discovery+ home renovation and redecorating shows, and that’s probably equivalent to rewatching TV shows because it’s a set formula: the house is a wreck at the start and at the end it’s fixed and pretty. Harlequin romance for houses. That is likely linked to soothing my Anxiety, and providing pretty solutions which helps with Depression, and safe predictableness (there is no unexpected violence in home repair and landscaping, & I avoid Ty Pennington because I don’t like yelling) with my PTSD and c-PTSD.

My comfort rereads mainly happen when I’m stressed or in a lot of pain, and then I reread favorite books from fantasy series mainly (Mercedes Lackey’s Valdemar world, Anne McCaffrey’s Pern series, nearly anything by Ilona Andrews but especially her Innkeeper series). When I’m stressed I don’t want to be on this world. In fantasy books by the end, there will likely be a happy-for-now ending. ( Except in the two trilogies recommended by former boyfriends wherein, both times, I read the whole monumentally depressing trilogy waiting for it to get good. It didn’t. Those lead to the formula mentioned above.) when life is super busy, I’ll reread favorite lighter books, mainly or romance (Sarah McLean, Tessa Dare, Robyn Carr, Nora Roberts, Courtney Milan, Alexis Hall, etc). When not stressed, anxious, or depressed, I read SF/F, romance, mysteries, history, and memoirs & biographies, mainly.

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Thanks so much for sharing all this. I find ti so interesting if we do/don’t repeat ... totally makes sense that the formulaic hgtv where the problem is solved in the end of one episode is a balm for anxiety!

Sorry to hear of the digestive issues. I was having some a bit ago and it was so uncomfortable and made eating so hard! Would definitely order same safe foods if I was in that boat. ❤️❤️❤️

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