Thoughts on Art and Mental Health with Mya Dexter
"Waking up in the morning, knowing I have created a new portrait or written a new poem, and they are waiting for me in my tiny office is the most exciting thing!"
I got the chance to first start getting to know Mya Dexter when she offered to be part of The Artist’s Mind virtual book tour here on Substack. She did a chapter review of the section I wrote on Yayoi Kusama and generously said:
“Kathryn approaches her subject with a gentle, generous, and validating curiosity, inviting her reader to follow suit. Kathryn’s latest book, The Artist’s Mind, showcases the relationship between artists and their mental health struggles, including the psychosocial dimension of their unique experience, thinking about whether art helped or hindered -or perhaps both- their well-being.”
Of course, people who are interested in my book are often themselves creatives who live with various mental health challenges. (And, as you might know if you read my writing often, I tend to think we are all artists with mental health challenges.) Mya is here with us today to share her own thoughts on this topic.
We initially planned to structure this as an interview. However, Mya writes so poetically that instead, we’ve structured into a more free flowing expression of her thoughts with just a few prompts here and there …
Who is Mya Dexter?
Mya is a “poet, writer and apprentice creator of monochrome portraits” whose bi-monthly newsletter The Bite Of The Sun is all about “showcasing art in its myriad forms as it fuels joy, connection and further creation.”
Art and Mental Health: Mya’s Story
I started to show signs of an anxiety disorder/panic disorder from the time I was 9 or 10. Social anxiety always present too, intense anxiety episode with debilitating agoraphobia in mid-twenties, prescribed antidepressants ever since. Increase in anxiety/agoraphobia since mid-forties to current.
I used to write quite obsessively from the age of 8; love music and art, and tried to create what I wished I could have created musically/visually through poetry instead. Spent decades not creating, but the bug was always there. Change in circumstances mean I have recently rekindled my love of words; started to draw too.
I think I started to write as therapy; I used to feel I just had to write and wasn't really in control of it all. That felt a little scary to me; didn't want to struggle as I had seen my dad struggle with his own art. Also aware of the common link between art and mental health and thought I already had enough on my plate!
But of course, it is still there, and it actually supports my mental health if I find a way to embrace it that fits with my neuroses perhaps. Also thinking that ironically for someone with very poor computer skills, not having to go out/travel makes it more accessible than the old fashion way of writing with regards to anxiety/agoraphobia.
I think very clearly in my writing: often angst-ridden. I started drawing because I was exploring the idea of a book designed for youngsters on the autism spectrum and wondered if I could create the characters myself to be self-sufficient; it transpired that all have this sadness imbued, unwittingly, and I have to dig deep to step away form that. I stick to monochromatic, but that is simply because of my lack of skills! I actually love colours, I'm just not there yet.
What have been the hard parts of mental health impacting your creativity?
I think as you’ve mentioned yourself, the hopelessness and exhaustion can interfere tremendously with my plans, and of course, the sheer effort required to remain engaged and committed means that I am much slower than I wish.
I remember as a fresh-faced 18 year old, I was already so disillusioned by the amount of talent/competition around me, thinking there was no point in even trying as I would never be good enough. Not voicing my convictions meant no-one had any chance of convincing me otherwise, hence decades abandoning the creativity I had in me. Business wise, poetry never seemed like a good move! My own inner self-doubts and pessimism simply consolidated my views this was never even an option.
I would have pursued further education in so many artistic fields if my mental health and finances allowed! Just so grateful that we have other ways now to engage and learn without leaving home.
What are the best parts?
Waking up in the morning, knowing I have created a new portrait or written a new poem, and they are waiting for me in my tiny office is the most exciting thing! I see it differently, the mistakes jump out at me, but also the joy that I did this! It sometimes replenishes my half-empty self-esteem. With poetry, I see how the strength of despair has become something tangible I might share, that hopefully might resonate with someone else also in pain. Having recently started to make a few meaningful connections with writers and creatives has filled my optimism back up, as suddenly it appears that there is indeed a way to reach out and be inspired by some fascinating and talented creatives, and their generosity and their own path is the most amazing inspiration for my own. I guess not feeling so marginalised any more, even if it is just thanks to a handful of people I might never meet in the flesh!
Some of My Favorite Posts by Mya:
And of course her stop on my virtual book tour:
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Oh, I love that bunny so much! Thank you for sharing.
Oh thank you so much, Kathryn, for putting this together so beautifully!